Okay, this isn't really news, but I thought I'd share a story that my friend wrote for his Spanish class. It involves the secret to beating influenza! (notice all the factual errors)
By Jared Sun
Translation from Spanish:
Once upon a time, in the magical kingdom of Royo, there was a king named Tomas. King Tomas was no ordinary king. He was a magical king, with a court of intelligent people. They were his advisors and he listened to them for everything. When there was a problem, King Tomas asked his advisors for help. After, King Tomas would use his magic and solve the problem.
Everything was perfect until one day. A cheese factory exploded and the cheese fell all over Royo. The cheese rotted and Royo was stinky. "What do I do?!" King Tomas asked his advisors. "Rats each cheese, if you summon rats they will eat the cheese," said the advisors. King Tomas summoned rats, and the rats ate the cheese.
The next day, King Tomas was not happy. The rats were everywhere. They infested the houses. "What do I do!?" King Tomas asked his advisors. "Cats eat rats, if you summon cats they will eat the rats," said the advisors. King Tomas summoned cats, and the cats ate the rats.
The next day, King Tomas was not happy. The cats were everywhere, saying, "Meow! Meow!" "What do I do!?" King Tomas asked his advisors. "Bears eat cats, if you summon bears they will eat the cats," said the advisers. King Tomas summoned bears, and the bears ate the cats.
The next day, King Tomas went for a swim but was not happy. The ocean was filled with blood because the bears were eating the people of Royo. "What do I do!?" King Tomas asked his advisers. "Elephants trample bears, if you summon elephants they will trample the bears," said the advisers. King Tomas summoned elephants, and the elephants trampled the bears.
The next day King Tomas was eating dinner but he was not happy. The queen was not there because she had been crushed by an elephant, elephants were everywhere. "What do I do!?" King Tomas asked his advisers. "Elephants are particularly susceptible to influenza, if you summon influenza it will kill the elephants," said the advisers. King Tomas summoned influenza and the influenza killed the elephants.
The next day, King Tomas was extremely furious! King Tomas and all the people of Royo had influenza, and they were sick. "What do I do!?" King Tomas asked his advisers…very weakly. "Alcohol kills bacteria, if you summon tequila it will cure the influenza," said the advisers…very weakly. King Tomas summoned tequila, an ocean of tequila flowed through Royo, and the tequila cured the influenza.
The next day, everyone was happy.